Holiday Self-Care Redefined: Practical Tips for a Meaningful Season

The holidays are here—a time for joy, celebration, and connection. But let’s be real: they’re also a time of stress, overwhelm, and endless to-do lists. Did you know that nearly 88% of adults feel stressed during the holiday season? For many women, especially those juggling family, work, and social commitments, the pressure to create “perfect” holidays can leave us feeling depleted. No one is thinking about real holiday self-care this time of year.

But this year, let’s do things differently. Inspired by Pooja Lakshmin’s incredible book, Real Self-Care: A Transformative Program for Redefining Wellness, I’m sharing practical tips to help you redefine self-care—not as a seasonal luxury, but as a sustainable way to nurture yourself during the holidays and beyond.

The Myth of Holiday Self-Care

When we think of holiday self-care, what comes to mind? A glass of wine by the fire? A luxurious spa day? While those things can be enjoyable, they often feel unattainable—or they don’t address the deeper stresses that weigh on us.

As Pooja Lakshmin writes, “Real self-care is not a noun; it’s a verb.” True self-care isn’t about quick fixes or indulgences; it’s about setting boundaries, aligning our actions with our values, and practicing self-compassion. It’s a process that helps us reclaim our time, energy, and emotional well-being.

Here’s how you can start practicing real self-care this holiday season:

Three Principles of Real Self-Care (Holiday Edition)

1. Set Boundaries Without Guilt

The holidays can stretch us thin, especially when we say “yes” to everything. From extra work commitments to hosting gatherings, it’s easy to feel overwhelmed.

• The Problem: 53% of mothers report feeling increased stress during the holidays due to added responsibilities.
• The Solution: Politely decline commitments that don’t align with your capacity. Whether it’s saying no to hosting a party or scaling back your holiday card list, remember that boundaries are an act of self-respect.

Real self-care is about saying no, so you can say yes to what truly matters.

Practical Tip: Try this phrase: “Thank you for thinking of me, but I’m not able to take this on right now.”

2. Practice Self-Compassion

Perfectionism runs high during the holidays. Whether it’s a perfectly decorated tree or the most thoughtful gift, we often place unnecessary pressure on ourselves.

• The Problem: Unrealistic expectations lead to self-criticism and burnout.
• The Solution: Treat yourself with the same kindness you’d show a friend. When things don’t go as planned, remind yourself, “I’m doing my best, and that’s enough.”

As Pooja Lakshmin says, “Change how you talk to yourself.”

Practical Tip: When you feel overwhelmed, take a moment to pause. Close your eyes, place a hand on your heart, and say, “I deserve the same love and care I give to others.”

3. Align with Your Values

One of the biggest stressors of the season is trying to do it all. But here’s the truth: not every tradition or obligation is meaningful to you.

• The Problem: 43% of adults say holiday stress interferes with their ability to enjoy the season.
• The Solution: Reflect on what truly matters to you—whether it’s quality time with loved ones, giving back, or simply finding moments of peace—and focus your energy there. Let go of the rest.

Practical Tip: Ask yourself, “What memories do I want to create this holiday season?” Use your answer as a guide to prioritize activities and let go of those that don’t serve your vision.

A Gentle Reminder This Holiday Season

Real self-care isn’t indulgent—it’s foundational. As Pooja Lakshmin so beautifully puts it, “Self-love is also revolutionary and world-changing.” When you take care of yourself, you show up as your best self for the people and things you care about most.

If these ideas resonate with you, I can’t recommend Real Self-Care enough. It’s a thoughtful, empowering read that has the potential to change how you approach your own well-being—not just during the holidays, but all year round.

Your Turn: Take One Small Step

I challenge you to pick one of these principles and put it into practice this week. Maybe it’s saying no to something that feels overwhelming, giving yourself grace when things aren’t perfect, or focusing on the traditions that truly light you up.

And if this spoke to you, please share it with a friend who could use a reminder to put herself first this season.

Until next time, stay strong, stay balanced, and keep prioritizing YOU. 🧡